The World Lies-It's not all about ME...

I just want to be pretty, accepted, attractive, desired, and so much more.  I want the people I hang out with to pay attention about me, care about me, and love me.  I am stressed on all the little things in life, and I just HAVE to get them all straightened out. Money, looks, getting my work done in a perfect way....

This is just all a lie.

I am 20 years old and I am a Christian who desires to follow the Lord and His way for my life.  But why do I sit around and dwell on the lies that are stated above?  When I am not focused on the Lord, all these things creep back into the picture.  Life is definitely not perfect, but why do we as humans try to make life perfect, when indeed it is not?

It is the weakness of the flesh.

Tonight, I was at the Missionary Dinner at Ashland Baptist Church in Lexington and I was asked along with others to sit at a table with members of the church and share about my summer-the things that I did, what I had learned, what the focus was.  And I most definitely made it a bigger deal than it was supposed to.  Even up to last week, I was stressed about bringing pictures that we were supposed to bring and yelling at technology as it continually lied to me and I couldn't get all my pictures perfectly the way I wanted it to be.  To my surprise, (well, not really) I didn't even use the pictures that I was asked to bring.  I managed to still make this night about me as I desired to show people all my pictures and the neat things that I did in Santa Cruz.  Yes, to a point this is natural that you want to share what you did with your summer-but I think I left out God...

God seems to take a backseat when I'm stressed.

I just wanted to go back to SCSP when the night was over.  The dinner went well, the food was delicious.  Yet, I was tired.exhausted.worn out from trying to make this first week of class happen on my own efforts.  I wanted things that made my life easier, yet drowning in things that I should give away, but selfishly wanting to keep it all.  I wanted to turn to a friend and say that I need encouragement, and I can't do it on my own.

But what is it that I truly NEED?

Wait a moment.  There is all this want, want, want, but where have I said that I need something?  I keep doing everything on my own and forgetting that I need God. And God alone.  I can want my SCSP community back, but what is there is a push to God, the Comforter of my soul.  When I am so exhausted, I tend to want human contact and comfort-and that is where I fail, BIG TIME.    I have the best place to run to, and it is into my Father's Arms.  I can CRY at His feet, FEEL His warm embrace around me.  But why do I not go there?  This world tries to define it differently and I have fallen into the mold where a hug is what will make me feel better-words will make it all better.

But where is God?

I learned a lot this summer: growing in my time spent with the Lord, learning to be bold and unafraid of others, being patient and a servant.  I have forgotten all of that when life takes a different turn.  I have neglected to read the Word this week, I have forgotten to let God be sovereign in my life.  I have confronted fears, attached them with feelings of brokenness.  I have been blessed with great friends, support, and so much more than I can ever ask for.

I decided to make my treasure all the little things in life...

Matthew 6:21  "For where your treasure is, there will be your heart also."   

I give this week back to God.  He has shown that He can control-and He will always get His way.  I have to actively choose to say that every moment is His, just like this summer.  It doesn't matter where I am, it only matters that He is here, and never going to leave.  So why do I walk away from this great gift? No one ever knows why, but we know that Satan tries to get his way-My God is BIGGER and wins me over every time :)

Pray for me, for us as believers to not walk away from God's Hand in the midst of hardship-but to walk straight into His arms every second of every day.  And NEVER walk away from an opportunity to get into His Word and overflow our own cup.

<3 Melinda

1 Peter 5:7  "Give ALL your worries to him, because he CARES about you. " (Emphasis added)

A New Journey at Home

Greetings Everyone-

It has been a while since I posted, but since then I have returned home back in Ohio.  The last week was incredible and hard at the same time since we all had to leave the friendships and bonds that we have made over the last 10 weeks.  But it is also a time to rejoice as we are now able to return to our homes and campuses with so much new knowledge and tools that will help us share the Gospel when we return. 

In my last post, I had mentioned that our team was headed to Yosemite National Park in El Portal, CA.  The 5 hour drive was beautiful, and even though my van took a detour, we were all able to see God's immense beauty as we traveled to Yosemite.  We even found a Chick-fil-a (YAY), but we were sadly informed that it was Sunday, and Chick-fil-a is not open...it is always on Sunday :) But even after all of that we were able to make it there safely and stay in a luxurious hotel lodge.  It was really nice to get away for a few days, but we really missed the Peter Pan.  On Sunday night, we headed up to Glacier Point for dinner and Praise&Worship while out looking the entire park.  I can say that it was the most beautiful place I had ever seen! Much better than the Grand Canyons, because we could actually hike in Yosemite. 

I was also given the opportunity to share my testimony at Glacier Point, and I would not have changed it for anything.  To see how my confidence had grown this summer and to hear the words of what God has done in my own life was amazing.  God has done such a work in my life this summer, that it was reflected in my short testimony in front of 55 of my friends. 

Here comes the best and worst part...on Monday morning, 26 of us embarked on a hike to Half-Dome, something that was seen from Glacier Point.  It is a 17.8 mile round-trip hike, with 4,100 feet elevation change (yes, that does mean pretty such straight up!) and at the end to even get up to the top of Half-Dome, we pull ourselves up the side of this mountain by the use of arm strength and cables. (The best way to see it is google Half-Dome hike)  I wanted to do it, and I knew it was going to be hard...starting your morning at 4:15am to get on the trail before sunrise was a big endeavor.  Yet, after a LONG day, I can say that ALL 26 of us made it to the top and back with no one being left behind. It was so exhausting, but the immense beauty at the top cannot be matched.  I also thank God for Christian guys that had the patience and willingness to stay with me on the way up and back.  I honestly could not have done it without them. It made me realize where my standards should be set and what God can do in someone's life to help serve. 

Returning to the Peter Pan on Tuesday morning was exciting but hard at the same time because it meant that we had to start cleaning up the Pan and packing everything away in the PODS.  The summer had gone by so fast, yet it was a summer full of joy.  I don't know what else to say about the rest of the week, other than the fact that it was not rushed, or hard but rather set up by great leadership and time to gather our thoughts and spend time with co-workers before we had to leave. 

Friday night on the other hand, was so hard.  As our last night together, we shared dinner together and had time to share with the group of things that we learned, what was hard, and just thanking everyone for the impact that they had on our lives.  After that, we received our Yearbooks-and this started an all-night event of signing yearbooks with encouraging notes and sharing with each other what they have seen in us this summer.  To see the love and determination to sign yearbooks  for hours on end was incredible and so much better than signing high school yearbooks!! We had all left a mark on one another and desired to share that with each and every person, that brought joy to my heart. 

As the night went on, people started leaving for their flights,and it was truly a sad time.  To see the tears and hugs made it seem a little more real that we were leaving, that this summer had come to an end.  When the buses came to pick everyone that was flying home, it was hard beyond belief to get on that bus and know that it would be the last time that we would see the Peter Pan, the Boardwalk, and everything in Santa Cruz.  To leave he people that were driving home was even harder knowing that they would be able to stay with their friends just a little bit longer. 

Being back home has been a joy, knowing that I am with my family, that I will be able to pour into others in just a short time.  I am excited to return to school in 2 weeks to see my friends, my church, and let the Lord use me for His glory.  It is hard not being around 55 people that you can always talk to, but Christian community cannot last forever, as we are sent out in the world to share the Gospel.  The best part-we will all see each other in November, at reunion :)  We will all have stories to share, opportunities to encourage, and just to see what God does in our lives. 

THANK YOU for all that you have given me this summer, whether it was financially, physical needs, or even just prayer.  I am so thankful to have this opportunity and what God was able to teach me this summer.  I will continue to blog as the Lord works in my life this semester, so feel free to bookmark my blog and follow my walk with Christ!!

<3 Melinda